UFL

Teams	W	L	T	GB	Pct
*Catwomen*	157	99	0	-	.613
*Hackers*	155	101	0	2	.605
*Toiletbrushers*	152	104	0	5	.594
*Mallers*	146	110	0	11	.570
*1/4 Pounders*	144	112	0	13	.563
Rulers	140	116	0	17	.547
*Pounders*	139	117	0	18	.543

In week 17,the Toiletbrushers (10-6) prevailed, but it was not enough to offset the Catwomen who at 8-8 won their first championship! The Hackers who turned in a healthy 9-7 mark, fell short by 2 games. The Meat-Cleavers shaved off 10 games in 5 weeks, but could not claim the top spot. The Mallers and Pounders weighed in at 8-8 finishing off what was a disappointing season for both franchises. The 1/4 Pounders (7-9) and Rulers (7-9) ended a promising season on a sour note. Both franchises improved dramatically from last year!

In week 16,it was again the Hackers who continued to close the gap with an exemplary 1st place weekly finish at 13-3! The Hackers have now shaved the overall lead down to 3 games! The Toiletbrushers (7-9) suffered a hard set back which may have flushed their championship hopes down the drain for this week. The Catwomen showed themselves worthy with an outstanding 11-5 record. With this performance, the Cats put distance between themselves and the T-Brushers while minimizing damage from the hard charging Meat-Cleavers! Although the Mallers checked in with an impressive 11-5 mark, they were officially eliminated after week 16 along with the 1/4 Pounders (9-7), Rulers (7-9) and Pounders who hammered their way to an 8-8 clip!

In week 15 the Hackers continued to close the gap with an impressive 1st place weekly finish at 10-6! The Hackers used their dirty defense to beat their opponents into submission. The Pounders surprised the division with an equally impressive 10-6 campaign. The Pounders hammered the opposition relentlessly and wreaked havoc to contenders in the waning weeks of the season. Both the Toiletbrushers and Rulers turned in a respectable 9-7. The T-Brushers have also closed the gap to 1st place to just 3 games, but now have the Hackers just 2 games behind them! The Catwomen lost ground with an off week (7-9). The Mallers and 1/4 Pounders were also a disappointing 7-9 while facing elimination from contention.

In week 14 action is what the sizzling Hackers were at it again posting their 2nd 13-3 mark in 3 weeks to close within 8 games of the leaders! In doing so the Meat-cleavers passed the 1/4 Pounders (10-6). In a 3-way tie for 2nd the Mallers, Pounders and Rulers all checked in at an impressive 11-5. The Pounders bounced back after a disappointing week and the Tiny Titans kept pace just 3 games behind the Mall-Nazi's. The Toiletbrushers (10-6) picked up some ground on the invincible Catwomen who stumbled at 8-8 for the week. With the recent torrid stretch of the Hackers, there is a new sheriff in town as it is now a 3-team race in the final weeks of another exciting season in the UFL!

The Catwomen continued their dominance with an impressive 1st place finish at 12-4 for the week extending their lead to 7 games over the 2nd place Toiletbrushers (10-6)! The Feline Fanatics clawed their way to an impressive week using their elusiveness on offense and quickness on the defensive side of the ball. The Mallers logged an equally impressive 12-4 good enough for a 1st place tie. The Mall-Nazi's unorthodox, reckless, defensive schemes confused opponents in addition to their wide-open offensive tactics. The Hackers kept pace checking in at 11-5. The Meat-Cleavers have been outstanding of late while bouncing back from a mediocre week previously. The 1/4 Pounders scored a 9-7 mark but are holding a slim 1 game lead over the hard charging Hackers. The Q-Pounders hammered their opponent into submission, but were not as effective offensively. The Rulers have slipped of late but managed a 9-7 record for the week. In the process, the mini-titans fell 3 games behind the Mallers. The Pounders record was 9-7 which was 1 of 3 teams tied for the week. With time running out, the Hammers must put together consistent weeks to jump back into the playoff hunt.

Week 12 was another example of the dominance of "The Cat". The Ferocious Felines went 11-5 capturing their 7th week (58%) in the season so far. With only 4 weeks left, the Catwomen are in excellent position for their 1st championship. The Toiletbrushers were not far behind at 10-6 but did manage to lose a game and have fallen back 5 off the pace. The Rulers and the Mallers also checked in at 10-6 while picking up a game respectively on the 9-7, 4th place Hackers. The 1/4 Pounders scored a respectable 9-7 and the Pounders broke even at 8-8 while remaining in the basement 14 games back.

In week 11, it was the Hackers (14-2) who set a season record using their aggressive defense while catapulting to the top spot for the week. The Meat-cleavers have been quiet all year but picked the right time to peak while putting together successive weeks and jumping back into the championship hunt. As in the last several weeks, we've had more congestion as three teams checked in tied for 2nd at 11-5 including: the defending champion Catwomen, the upstart 1/4 Pounders and the rebounding Pounders. The 1/4 Pounders have been the model of consistency all year. The Catwomen have been hard to move from the top spot and the Pounders closed to within a game of climbing back out of the cellar. The Rulers, checked in at 9-7 and fell back into a tie with the Mallers (10-6). These 2 clubs have been at each other for the last several weeks as the Mallers can't seem to get through. With 5 weeks left, the crown is still up for grabs. The Toiletbrushers chugged along at 9-7 for the week while keeping pace with the leaders despite a mediocre performance.

The defending champion Catwomen (9-5) were part of a record breaking, 6-team conglomeration of 1st place finishers for another interesting week in the UFL! For the 1st time in the history of this young league, 6 teams won the week! This record shattered last weeks' record of 4 top finishers. The Toiletbrushers, 1/4 Pounders, Rulers, Hackers, and Pounders all placed an impressive 9-5 record. The Cats have continued to hold off the mighty T-brushers. Both of the newest franchises, the 1/4 Pounders and Rulers continue to be the surprise of the season thus far. The Rulers climbed over the inconsistent Mallers (6-8). The Penny-pinchers again had their problems on both sides of the ball. The Mallers were the only team with a losing record this week. Only 3 games separate 4 teams from the basement in this tight race.

The defending champion Toiletbrushers (9-5) were part of a 4-team conglomeration of 1st place finishers for an interesting week 9 of the UFL! For the 1st time in the history of this young league, 4 teams won the week. The Catwomen, 1/4 Pounders, and Rulers all placed an impressive 9-5 record. The Cats have scratched and clawed their "turf" in holding on to a slim 2-game overall lead over the T-Brushers. The 1/4 Pounders have been the surprise team of the league while only a meager 7 games back. The Rulers climbed to within 2 games of the Mallers. The Greenskins checked in again at 7-7. The Mallers have been disappointing with an inconsistent offensive scheme. The Hackers logged a respectable 8-6 while digging themselves out of the basement. The Rough-Houser's maintained their composure which paid off this week. The Pounders were not far of the pace, but dropped to 6-8 while losing 3 full games on the leaders.

The Catwomen (7-7)clinched the seasons first star by hanging on with the best first half record after 8 weeks! The Cats held off a furious charge by the defending champion Toiletbrushers who "logged" an impressive 10-4 for the week while closing to within 2 games of the overall league standings. The Pounders were a tough-tested 7-7 for the week to keep pace as was the Mallers who checked in at 7-7. Both teams did not lose any ground in the standings. The Hackers were a disappointing 6-8 and fell alone in to the basement. The The 1/4 Pounders took it on the chin dropping to 5-9 while losing 2 games off the leader pace. The Rulers also fell hard for their season worst record at 4-10.

Races are heating up as the league approaches the 1/2 way point. Only 11 games separates 1st through last which represents the first time in league history that this span has been so close! In week 7, it was the Toiletbrushers (11-3) who claimed their first "week win". The Brushers reverted back to what made them so successful; their grimy, stingy defense which goes to the bowels of extreme to flush opponents out of their offensive schemes! Along with the T-Brushers were week co-champs, the Pounders who also checked in at 11-3. The Pounders utilized their relentless ways and returned to what made them a successful franchise. The 1/4 Pounders checked in with an impressive 10-4 mark and closed to within 5 games of the league leaders. The Q-Pounders have been the model of consistency through the halfway point of this season. Tied for the 3rd slot in week 7 were the upstart Rulers and the veteran Mallers who logged in at 9-5. This marked the 2nd time in successive weeks that the clubs had identical records! Interestingly enough, there is only a game difference between the two clubs with the Mallers holding advantage. The Catwomen turned in a mediocre performance and have seemed to level off as of late. They have logged successive 8-6 weeks and lost some ground in the standings. The Hackers checked in at 8-6 losing some momentum in the late going due to unsportsmanlike conduct and excessive hacking penalties. They now are in a dead heat for the basement with the Pounders.

The Rulers and the Mallers were the champions of week 6! The Rulers dominated using their stubborn defense to top the charts at 10-4. The tiny princesses reversed a 4-10 drubbing the week earlier to pick up 2 games on the leader this week. The Mallers were simply outstanding (10-4) winning the second time in 6 weeks. Their wide-open offensive maneuvers perplexed the opposition. Also turning in impressive weeks were the twin cities Pounders and 1/4 Pounders who both logged a 9-5 record. The Pounders were relentless and chalked up their best week of the season. The QP's were deceptively brutal, while beating the defense into submission. The Catwomen turned in a respectable 8-6 but lost some ground on the lead. The Hackers rebounded late to check in at 8-6 while again overcoming unnecessary roughing penalties during crucial portions of the game. The Toiletbrushers kept pace with an 8-6 mark using their patented swirl defense. The races are heating up as 4 teams are separated by 2 games. The Cats still hold a commanding 7 game lead over the QP's!!

The impressive Catwomen (9-5) won again for the 4th time in 5 weeks. The Cats outsmarted the opposition with clever, nimble moves when it counted. The Toiletbrushers kept pace with a 7-7 mark in another defensive battle tested week. The 1/4 Pounders fell off the pace a bit but are still tied for 2nd. The Q-Pounders slipped during the week logging in at 6-8 thanks to some last minute miracles by the opposition... The Mallers held their ground at 7-7 which was good enough to gain a spot in the standings. The Mall-haters resorted to some offensive trickery in order to fool the opposing team this week. Tied for 5th are the Rulers and the Hackers. The tiny princesses fell hard at 4-10 as they were victimized by unnecessary roughing penalties and unsportsmanlike conduct call during crucial portions of the game. The Hackers played tough defense and checked in at 7-7 while the Pounders rounded out the week dead last at 5-9. The Pounders have fallen under criticism as of late due to reports of underachieving.....

The Catwomen (9-5) won again for the 3rd time in 4 weeks nipping the feisty 8-6 Rulers. The tiny queens resorted to unorthodox defensive schemes which wore down the opponent to the point of submission and to the likes we have never seen. The Pounders rebounded nicely for and 8-6 mark, breaking a string of 3 consecutive last place finishes. The 1/4 Pounders checked in at a respectable 7-7 while capitalizing on there relentless pounding. The Toiletbrushers tied for the 4th slot with a disappointing 6-8 clip and lost some ground on the 1st place Cats. The Hackers also struggled this week at 6-8 while being victimized by several untimely roughing penalties at inopportune times. The Mallers rounded out the week dead last at 5-9 as their offensive stalled throughout the game.

In a defensive oriented week, it was the Rulers who came out on top. The tiny titans used definitive defensive plays to thwart their opponents. The Mallers also tied for the top spot with a respectable 8-6 and gained some ground on the 1st place Catwomen. The Cats struggled this week at 6-8. The Hackers and Toiletbrushers drew even at 7-7 and also picked up some ground on the leaders. The 1/4 Pounders logged a 6-8 mark while the Pounders came in last (their third straight week) but remained 10 games back.

The Catwomen won for the second week in a row utilizing their quickness and clawing defense while logging in with an impressive 13-3. The upstart 1/4 Pounders hammered their way to a solid 11-5 mark during this young season. The T-Brushers flushing defense was the difference in an impressive 10-6 record for the second time in as many weeks. The Mallers also checked in at 10-6 which showed a 2 game improvement attributed to their wide-open offensive schemes. in their week 1 success coming in at 10-6 and the 1/4 Pounders did the same. The Q-Pounders relentless persistence was the difference. The Hackers and Rulers checked in with a respective 9-7 record for the week while the Pounders again disappointed their fans with a 7-9 showing and are now 10 games off the pace.

The Catwomen drew first blood in the young season while winning the week at 11-5 using their clawing defense! The T-Brushers cleansing defense also was a factor in their week 1 success coming in at 10-6 and the 1/4 Pounders did the same. The Q-Pounders relentless persistence was the difference. The Hackers, Mallers and Rulers checked in with an 8-8 record for the week while the Pounders were a disappointing 7-9, 4 games off the pace.

The Unlikely Football League had its originations around 2001 but truly gained more popularity last season. The league became more organized and the owners assumed names that were indicative of some humorous thing that they were known for. In 2002, the competition was fierce but the Mallers emerged as the champions fending off the Hackers down the stretch!

In 2003, the league instituted a new point system based on earned "stars" for several categories. This was done so that if a team ran away in wins by mid-season (overall-record champion being worth 3 stars), other teams could earn "stars" incrementally and the overall championship still viable for all owners.

By the way, its really pretty simple, we all make feeble attempts at trying to come up with who will win Sunday's football games before they are played (no points) and determine who had the better record afterwards!

Known for their true hatred for going to the mall, the Mallers are known for their stingy defense against those going for the wallet and its contents. Also know as the Mall-Nazis for their miserable disposition once agreeing to go to the mall , the Mallers despise crowded places and congested defenses while enjoying a more wide-open offense scheme.

Also known as the T-Brushers, this bunch is a "roll-up-your-sleeves-get-dirty" group willing to go to the bowels of the earth to assure a clean environment for all. Their defensive package includes flushes and spins in order to keep teams off balance. Their dreaded motto: "It's a dirty job, but somebody's got to do it!"

This bunch is known for their vicious hitting, hacking and slapping of opposing team members. As a matter of fact, slapping sounds can be heard from up to 50 feet away when this team is in town. They know how to schmooze the refs and are best at hacking when the ref isn't looking. This team also plays in the PFL (Pool Football League) to keep in shape for the UFL. It is believed, their bad habits were picked up there.....

The Pounders are known for their consistent, relentless, pounding offense that does not stop. They achieve victory in many instances by wearing opponents down with the same thing, over and over, and over and over, over and over again. Their defensive scheme involves selective forgetfulness which totally overwhelms opposing defenses to the point of exasperation and mental instability. It is at this point where the offense thrives and can bring an opponent to its knees.

This expansion team is young, full of energy and ready to go. The 1/4 Pounders have embraced many of the characteristics of the Pounders while some say it is a "pounder" team in the making. They are also known for their consistent, relentless, pounding offense that does not stop. Their defensive scheme involves selective listening which frustrates and confuses opposing defenses. Their "bull-in-the-china-shop" smash-mouth offense is its patent trade-mark.

The second of the two expansion teams, the Rulers are a relentless outfit using unique tactics to get their own way. On many occasions they resort to uncharacteristic methods of behavior which can physically wear down opponents over time. The name "Rulers" was adopted to truly reflect the domination that they have over those that would dare to attempt at changing their environment.

One of the original founding teams, this bunch is known for its ferocious, cat-like defense. On offense, its members are quick, crazed and ready to outrun its opponent for a quick meal anytime. The ownership boasts the highest IQ in the world and uses this brilliance to draft an over-abundance of talent to assure a championship caliber team is put on the field every week.